Ellen DeGeneres

Best Quotes

• You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is.

• I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, Soup of the Day: Cream of Asparagus. Ellen DeGeneres.

• I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. Well, I think my mother is attractive, but I just keep photographs of her.

• We use 10 percent of our brains. Imagine how much we could accomplish if we used the other 60 percent.

• We use 10% of our brains. Imagine how much we could accomplish if we used the other 60%.

• My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-five now, and we don't know where the hell she is

• My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.

• In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better.

• I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves.

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