Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: Are your ready?
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
'Your chances of getting hit by lightning go up if you stand under a tree, shake your fist at the sky and say 'Storms suck!'.
For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.
For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.
Who could follow Carson? Well, believe me, somebody can - and will.
The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money
The Hollywood tradition I like best is called 'sucking up to the stars.'
The difference between divorce and legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money
The closest thing to Roseanne Barr's singing the national anthem was my cat being neutered.
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